Whollapucklooza 2008

Hey you guys. Here in the states our celebration of our independence, the 4th of July, is now past and I’ll be damned if it isn’t full on summer! Hell yeah! It’s the time of year to enjoy life and do some celebrating.

My guys from the Outlaws used to usually have an annual alumni game and dinner party scheduled before the end of the summer season where we all get together for a couple of fun hours of ice time, a decent meal and one heck of a lot of drinkin and carrying-on. Generally migrating to the west coast we’ve had these events in Southern California in such places as: Santa Barbara, Palm Springs, and La Jolla. My memory fails me a little bit once in a while now days but it seems as though we came inland a bit once and had one of these whollapuckloozas in Vegas too.

All of these, for sure, were really fuckin good times.

Damn though, we haven’t had one for a while. I really miss the free-for-all fun that we had at these celebrations and the chance to re-connect with folks that I’ve skated with over the years. I kind figure that one of the reasons we haven’t had one recently is that most of us now have finally gotten married, or gotten “real jobs” and have made commitments to another life style.

Bull crap guys! You can have that other lifestyle for 364 days of the year but for just one day you gotta drop that shit and bring back the glory of days gone by. You gotta walk with wood again. The days of losing on the ice but winning in the bar. Hell, the days of winning both! Bring the wife, bring the kids, heck all mighty bring the grandkids. It’s time these folks loosen their shorts a bit and learn how to have a good time! Ehh?

So I’m thinkin that I’ve still got a bunch of Outlaw buddies and I’ve now gained just a bucket-a-crap full of internet skaters that just might be interested in pulling together a whollapucklooza for next summer. Yeah, you're thinkin “why not this summer?” Well I tell ya, it just takes too much planning to pull off the perfect event - that’s why. Puckheads - sheeeesh!

You know depending on participation it might have to be more of a tournament sort of thing eventually. But we’ll see. Maybe hand out some awards and do a bit of personality roasting at the dinner.

The idea that I have right now - to get the right party atmosphere - would be to tie it into the Sturgis rally in August of next year in western South Dakota. That’s a pretty central location for points in Canada and the States. Sturgis is going on August 4th through the 10th next year so start thinkin about setting that time aside. Do a little scooter-tootin, do a little puck shootin, and do a hella lotta partying, ehh!

About half my old Outlaws are now Harley riders so I think the tie-in will work pretty well. There’s a story to that you know. Back when I was coaching the Outlaws, this was when they were semi-pro, we had a kid that had skated for Badger Bob on our team. Maco, had gotten out a school and went to work for NCR as a bullshit sales person. He sold a software package to Bank of America and was set for life. Being from the great state of Wisconsin, having a particular love for that state’s famous brand of motorcycle and having an entrepreneurial spirit he started up EagleRider Motorcycle Rentals. The guys from the team invested with him and in turn got a Harley themselves. Not a bad deal now is that, ehh? He’s fuckin worldwide now and if you’ve got the money and the right location he’ll sell ya a franchise. I’m betting that if you don’t have a bike and want to participate in the Sturgis bike activities then you can probably rent one from Eagle Rider. Just remember to do it way in advance because the Europeans like to come over big time and get involved and just might already have him rented out for next year. Can’t say for sure though. Check it out, ehh?

So what’s Western South Dakota got to offer besides all the scooter-tootin activities associated with Sturgis?

Rapid City has the ice rink and is only about twenty-five miles from Sturgis. Its the Roosevelt Ice Arena over on Waterloo Street. Rage Hockey Club skates there. So while we’re staying in town let me tell ya that there are about sixty hotels, fifteen campgrounds and ten bed and breakfasts to choose from. If ya got your vehicle or scooter tied up and ya got the family with ya then they or you can get over to the rink on the Rapid Ride transit system. If ya show your skates ya can ride for free to the rink. The city has over forty bars and over ten banquet halls to choose from yet for our festivities. Shit howdy if I’m not gettin a bit excited thinkin about this!

“What else?”, your saying.

Well, damn right if we aren’t in the Black Hills. Pan for gold, ehh? We’ve got Mount Rushmore to go see. You know that that’s going to be a daily little scooter-toot for the bikers so that should be hella fun time. You can do some trout fishin if your into that sort of thing. And then there’s Deadwood.

I’m thinking that we could make a special excursion to Deadwood. Its become pretty famous these days due to the cable TV show of the same name and the whole town is on the National Historical Register. But why a special excursion, ehh? The Outlaws have an alumnus that has always carried the nickname of Wild Bill. He’s now become highly respected in the medicinal herbs and pharmaceutical industry; but that’s another story to be told at a later date, I’m sure. So to celebrate (Hell, who needs an excuse, ehh?) our Wild Bill, we’ll go visit the town where Wild Bill Hickock was gunned down from the back by Jack McCall while holding a dead mans hand (aces and eights) in a game of poker. Sheeeet, we’ll even have to go out to his memorialized grave site and tip some brewskies to the legend while we're certainly ensuring that our Wild Bill is getting totally inebriated.

One thing kinda interesting that I gotta mention about Wild Bill’s killer, Jack McCall, is that he got tried twice for the murder. The first time he was acquitted and set free and then later apprehended and found guilty and hung for his crime. Scary, the laws that they have in South Dakota, ehh?

I’m sure that there’s a shit load of other rollicking activities that we can get involved in and also a bunch of family doings around in the area - but I haven’t done enough research otherwise to discuss here at this time. I figure, myself, that about one tenth the population of South Dakota is related to me in some way or other, so I could catch up on some family ties and get rowdy drunk with cousins. Any of you guys and gals are welcome to join in, I’m sure. The Wheats family has always enjoyed a good time.


So whacha think? Whollapucklooza in 2008? Or another year? 2010 will be the 70th anniversary Sturgis Run. Wait til then and really whoop it up or what?


Jasper here - let me know what ya think.


Skate hard and walk with wood guys!