TV OVERTIME

Isn’t so ding-dang funny

Hey there my hockey buddies. Jasper Wheats here dishin some more hockey shiite. I’m feeling pretty good right now; watchin some good hockey on my TV and the Redwings are up right now one to nothin just startin the third period of game five. Yep, some good shiite when the team ya want to win is up. Walking with wood here my puckster crew.

But what the f…. happened yesterday???????

Thought it was also going to be a good day. I wake up and look over the end of the bed and see the nice framed poster artwork that the wife got me. Its a watercolor sort of a tranquil forest scene titled Morning Wood. Ehh? It’s always great to know that that Morning Wood is there when I start each and every day.

So I roll on out of bed do my morning toilet, take some ibuprofen for all my aches and pains, get the coffee going and fire up some ham and eggs for the morning meal. Ah that smells so good! So I chow and chug it all down and burp a little bit like a good boy.

Its still earlier then most of you puckheads are willing to get up on a Saturday morning. Ehh, had a little drinkiepoo last night, did ya? Yeah, in my day ya couldn’t keep up with me. No way, no how!

Anyway like I said it was still early, so I went for my twenty mile bike ride. Good shit ya know, gets me some of that extra exercise that I need now that I’ve started getting pudgy about the middle. Love handles they say. Beautiful day! Usually see some deer and sometimes wild turkeys. Today, the only wildlife I got see were a couple of jackrabbits. Wonder what they were up to, ehh?

I got back from the ride after about two hours and was a smidgen thirsty so I pounded a quick one before I turned on the TV for the Senators versus Sabres fifth game. Got myself settled into the recliner and to control of the clicker.

Good game to watch. I was rooting for Buffalo so was pleased to see that they held their own through regulation. I mean, you guys, they came into this game down three to one in the series. Ehh? And I wanted them to get to the finals.

Well shit the third period ended all tied up and what the f… do you think NBC does?????

Instead of continuing to follow the game they switch over to some damn horse race! The Preakness I guess it what they called this horse shit thing. I mean give me a break, buckeroo. This isn’t even a sporting event. Its a race where the only athletes are the horses. Dang gone was I pissed! The worst of it was that race didn’t even start until about an hour after the switch from hockey.

NBC thinks this must be some kind of special event considering they didn’t continue covering the Stanley Cup semi-final series game going into overtime. For what’s only as far as I can tell is a spectator sport only, if ya can call it a sport. I’m serious you guys. How many of ya have ever been in a horse race? OK, now how many of ya have ever played hockey? See? Not even close.

So, don’t rag on me you guys but I watched this shit. They interviewed the owners. What’s your strategy? "Oh I’m going to leave that up to the jockey." So they interview the jockeys. "Oh I’m going to let the horse do its thing, let him out and see what he does." So, this crap is all up to the horse. What a crap shoot, ehh?

Shit these little guys that are jockeys aren’t even athletes. Are they? Seems as though when you say "jockey" I just see these little guys out on rich peoples’ lawns. Well that’s where Frank Zappa

said that they were. I mean the soul purpose of a jockey is to knock them off the lawn; something that you do when your playing mailbox baseball. Swing away, ya know!
NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs in overtime or some stinking horse race???????? NBC, what were you thinking?????

So today I find out the remainder of the game was televised over on Versus. That would have been fine to know yesterday. Oh my goodness do I feel like a fool. I get Versus you know you guys? Oh my brain is smolderin now just thinkin about it. GRRRR!

Ya know though. I talked to my bro Jingles one day last week during a Ducks vs Redwings game and he said that he had to listen to it on the radio ‘cuz he doesn’t get Versus. Well, I haven’t talked to him today but I know him pretty damn well and he gets ticked off easily. We had our share of fights. So I’m sure that he was just steaming yesterday too.

How about you guys? How do ya feel about this horse shit? Let me know, ehh.

Maybe today they’ll do better as today’s game is just now going to start OT. Can NBC redeem itself and walk with wood again? We’ll see.